Horoscopes | Week of June 2-8, 2008

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Mix and mingle, leaving options open. Your assignment this week is simply to enjoy the pleasures that present themselves, without having to cling. If these words sound familiar, yes, I am merely reiterating suggestions which have been raised over the past couple weeks… and if you haven't already experienced others' attempts to block your easy-flowin' good times, then count yourself lucky. Probably, though, you've run into a busybody, an obsessive-compulsive or a situation-complicater or two who, perhaps despite their own best judgment, dared to drop their issues at your doorstep like a baby Moses, hoping beyond all hope that you will be the one to raise 'em into 'productive participants' in society. Unless that's your idea of fun, however, you need not accept their hassles. I keep hunting for different wordings for the same damn concept I'm echoing over and over again, but the bottom-line remains identical: Can you skim along the surfaces, satisfying your own need for entertainment and variety and motion, all while certain other people try to pin their shit on you and make it stick? They'd probably love to point out your Aries-ness as ammunition for their accusations you're just being self-centered. But is that any worse than taking on others' crapola—though you don't really want to and will ultimately resent 'em for it—and putting your own needs on the back-burner?


TAURUS (April 20-May 20): A hyperactive (read: multi-Gemini) atmosphere, such as the one we're currently cruising through, isn't exactly the sort where you straightforward Taurean lads and lasses generally thrive. That's not to say you won't be just fine, but I simply wanted to set a proper scene in case you've been feeling somewhat out of sorts. It's likely that everyone around you is operating on overdrive (or at least a higher gear than usual), which has the possibility of bumming you out, if, at the same time, you're not in the mood to hit the gas and speed yourself into the faster lane of traffic. Feel free to try and keep up—if, and only if, you want to. But there will be no negative consequences if you don't… other than the judgy perceptions certain others may adopt, when they see you refusing to drink the frenzy-fostering Kool-Aid they're gulping down by the gallonful. Are you secure enough to proceed at the pace most appropriate to you, regardless of the peer pressure you may fall temporary victim to? I hope so, Taurus. See, we know something that they have perhaps forgotten in the rush-rush-rush mentality of the present moment: Further down the road, they'll have lost their steam… but you'll still be plugging along at a fair pace. You've got persistence on your side, which should be more than enough to put all dizzying self-doubt to rest.


GEMINI (May 21-June 20): You're still the proverbial 'belle of the ball', Gemini… with so much planetary excitement lighting up your sign, you should have no problem finding dozens of peoples, places and things to fill every passing moment. (Can you even keep track?) And luckily, as long as you don't corner yourself into playing frivolous mind-games with your inner twin (like trying to 'reason through' which of the three events scheduled for the same time and same place is the 'most important', instead of just attending the one you want to go to), you'll be able to ride the serendipitous social flow with agile aplomb. However, to do so, you'll have to let up on any pretense of control over who arrives where when, where you're all headed next, and how it's all supposed to work. You could just as easily disrupt the perfect-just-as-it-is rhythm of the moment, simply by trying to 'perfect' it. As you're participating, don't struggle when the logistics start to become harrying. Let it happen as it's going to happen. Just make sure that, when plans change, you place the requisite phone calls and text messages to inform everyone who'll be affected. (Don't leave 'em hanging, or they'll be pissed off.) While you're at it, don't forget to take care of your own basics… like eating, sleeping and bringing the appropriate clothing. Everything else will take care of itself.


CANCER (June 21-July 22): Sometimes, the 'voices in our head' have lots of valuable information to help guide us to that which will best suit our purposes and desires (see: last week's scope). Other times, however, they don't do us any good. In fact, there could be so many conflicting stories (all repeating themselves annoyingly inside our brains, trying to compete for dominance), it would be impossible to get anything done if we tried listening to every last one of 'em. And thus, in just such a situation, we become paralyzed by the unchecked proliferation of 'what if?' scenarios… ending up exactly where we started, due to our being too freaked out (for no good real-world reason) to risk taking a step. This is the type of scene you may find yourself facing this week, Cancer, as all that 12th-house excitation works a number on your imagination—but not necessarily in a way that supports forward movement. Beware of latching onto this or that thought floating through your unconscious, convincing yourself it's some 'sign' of impending doom (instead of, say, a passing nibble of meaningless information) and running over all the ways it might possibly manifest and spoil everything. The minute your mind starts chewing on its absurd extrapolations, you're trapped in the anxiety. In this astro-environment, you cannot expect to analyze a path to the clearest answer. Your best tool is lots of deep breathing, conscious walking, and other meditative practices to silence your mind. In the end, no matter how much responsible forethought you put in, you'll still be just trying something… and hoping it'll all work out.


LEO (July 23-August 22): At every turn, work your magic to bring the people you know together. If you're off to the latest performance piece or organizational meeting, drag along a pal or two who you think will get a kick out of joining you. If you're heading out to dinner with a colleague or close friend, have your latest mentor or apprentice show up as your date. There's virtually no setting you'll find yourself in this week, Leo, where the principle of 'the more, the merrier' won't apply. You're especially well suited to take it upon yourself to plan big spontaneous happenings… so that your quiet-night-at-home-watching-TV suddenly transforms into Chinese takeout for a dozen of your closest friends barking at some dumb reality show… so that the weekend outing become a mini-reunion of all those old high-school or college friends who've been meaning to get together… and so every crack and giggle is amplified by the sheer magnitude of multiple people's energies joining forces for that much more of a good time. In case there were a doubt, this sort of celebration requires you to lead the brigade. Otherwise, it may not happen. But as long as you get excited about whatever's about to go down, you'll have no problem luring all your favorite peeps along for the ride. When in doubt, think 'kooky' over 'predictable'.


VIRGO (August 23-September 22): Assuming you spent the past week acclimating yourself to Mercury's retrograde, you're about ready to expand your tactics beyond the 'path of least risk' I previously recommended… and to one that flirts more dramatically with the 'nothing ventured, nothing gained' approach. Yes, Virgo, I feel it's definitely worth your while to assume the very 'risks' I just recently cautioned you against—mainly because you've got a less tenuous hold on the public's attention now and can effect a much more memorable impression of yourself than before. That is: It's time to get yourself noticed. And more than that: Should one way of getting noticed not seem to do the job, please don't hesitate to try another… or lots of different ones, however the mood strikes. At this point, the worst image you could portray to them is as a one-trick pony. They want to see your ability to mind-meld and shape-shift (without losing integrity, of course) based upon the ever-changing dynamics of a given situation, the key players that emerge or slip away, and the direction the wind's blowing that particular moment. Blink, and it's a different environment… and you should be able to thrive just as well, whether it's suddenly super-casual or ultra-formal, staying-put or on-the-go. Show them more than one side of your personality, instead of choosing one and relentlessly drilling the message home in a single unwavering tone. You'll make a much bigger splash by flashing your versatility than by holding the same expression no matter who's watching or what they expect of you.


LIBRA (September 23-October 22): You'll know you're on the right track, Libra, if you can identify at least a couple observational descriptions about where you are now (and where you'll soon be) that'd best be capped off with an exclamation point. Better yet, if you can annotate the cartoon bubbles above your head that are narrating the story with Batman-esque 'pow!'s and 'blam!'s and 'whammy!'s. Nothing in this chapter need be downplayed for subtle effect. These developments don't require a gradual introduction. Hopefully, the main thematic thread or two of your life is so obviously a page-turner right now, you'll have no trouble understanding where to put your focus. If nothing I've written thus far speaks to your current experience… well, you need some outside help. Before you dismiss those weird-sounding newfangled notions a certain close pal has recently been pushing, maybe you should pause and consider: What am I missing? Because if, with all the 9th-house stimulation you're currently receiving, you are not feeling moved in a particular direction and/or by a particular passion, you have nothing to lose by listening to someone who is. You're evidently due for some fresh lens through which you can gaze at life's juiciest questions… and your oddball pal may have a kernel or two to teach you. You don't have to swallow the whole dogmatic pill to gain a few wise bits. Open your mind, and see what shows up to fill the spot.


SCORPIO (October 23-November 21): Feel free to continue the trend of 'button-pushing' I implicitly advocated (or at least granted as a 'not terrible' idea) last week because… well, because it's probably healthier for you than, say, plastering your finger so close to the trigger that it twitches in anticipation yet never actually doing the deed. But your key to not shooting just to hear the loud discharge sound (or because you love the smell of fresh blood in the morning) can be found by balancing your trademark intensity with humility. In other words, while you may stumble upon a rich-and-dense explanation for, or solution to, a highly contested situation, it certainly isn't the only one. You can be passionate about exploring different possibilities without committing yourself to a single favorite. Your investigative hunger must not be fed beyond a reasonable point by your ego's need to be right… or else you'll contaminate the very sanctity of your work on this case, due to that naughty compulsion to gather only the evidence that supports your verdict while conveniently ignoring that which points to other potential scenarios. Don't count out helpful suggestions, just because you don't like the person they're coming from (or, for that matter, out of competitive spite). Keep drilling below the surface, since that's what you do so very well. However, remain open to the interpretations continuing to evolve, with new information offered by outside parties that should probably be considered.


SAGITTARIUS (November 22-December 21): If one of your favorite people asked you to hold their hand as the two of you jumped off a cliff, would you do it? Or have I gotten the question wrong… and is it you who's likelier to egg on your partner-in-crime to do the off-the-wall, the unthinkable and/or the just-plain-nuts? Whoever the main instigator is, the other one of you will have to stay on your toes to keep up this week, as all the planets in your relationship house play well off an especially venturesome Mars in the solar 9th. In fact, in the best-case scenario, you're both in the mood for some playful living-on-the-edge, and nobody has to 'convince' anybody else to take the leap. At the very least, one of you can channel his/her high-energy vibe into a form that cheerfully motivates your other half to get off his/her lazy bum… though, until one gets accustomed to the rapid-fire rate at which one activity bleeds into the next, it could get exhausting running all over town trying to keep up. Of course, there's another possible reason why all this 'running' is necessary—if, that is, one of you is attempting to juggle multiple love-interests without the other finding out. (It'd also explain the heightened potential for exhaustion, right?) It's not my business to school you on whether this 'playing' of the 'field' is a fantastic or fearsome approach… only to warn you that, this week, you'll be hard-pressed to avoid those unfortunate collisions where one 'life' is forcefully brought face-to-face with the other 'life'. So if you want to keep on fighting the inevitable moment (of coming clean? of getting caught?), I hope you've got a good pair of athletic shoes and a couple extra shots in your latte.


CAPRICORN (December 22-January 19): Yes, the devil really is in the details, just like they say. And I'm so quick to agree with that old adage, Capricorn, insofar as your week requires you to get the small stuff right… no matter how ridiculously petty or micromanager-ish you might walk away feeling, when the difference between 'getting it right' and not doing so may be virtually invisible to certain other folks. You know the type of people I'm talking about, eh? The ones who act totally cool, as if nothing fazes them, regardless of what happens? They're the very individuals likeliest to give you a hard time, just because you pointed out some small area that requires fine-tuning (or outright improvement). You must ignore their condescending scorn, righteous indignation, haughty ambivalence, or non-verbalized nasty attitude. If you've got your head screwed on straight, you're well aware this is simply about the task at hand—it's not a personal issue, nor should you allow it to be made into one. Nobody has the right to behave badly, just because of your high-but-reasonable expectations. You're not crazy for wanting the job done correctly, and your diligent attention to the littlest details is not a wasteful expenditure of energy. It only takes one wrong puzzle piece to subvert the entire pretty picture…


AQUARIUS (January 20-February 18): The happy combination of Venus (along with the Sun and Mercury) sextiling Mars across your solar 5th and 7th, the two houses associated with romantic relationships, is enough to lead even the amateur astrologer toward proclaiming good things for your love life this coming week. But of course, with all the burdensome social pressures to fall into perfect love-at-first-sight step with the man/woman of your dreams and have lots of babies and designer-furniture pieces filling your four-bedroom, set-on-half-an-acre home bearing down on us, it's way too easy to approach the whole 'love' thing with too many predefined ideas… and not enough of the pure joy of discovery. That's why I don't want to give you unfair expectations, Aquarius, and then field your angry emails about why another week passed without having encountered your soulmate, fireworks and all. But this is a wonderful week for sharing lots of laughs with someone whose company you enjoy—without stressing over whether he/she is The One or 'where it's all going'. Forget about needing answers, promises, pledges, plans or proper processing of relative significances. That's a surefire way to spoil all the fun. Set all considerations of the future aside (and yes, that even includes next week!). Enjoy each other now, while you've got the chance. Rather than clinging to what might one day be (or, then again, might not), create a lasting memory that will survive, regardless of what you ultimately 'prove' to mean to each other. Isn't there a silly activity or out-of-left-field daytrip you've always meant to try? Bring someone along who has a similar ability to appreciate such things, and take advantage of this unique moment you two will never share again.


PISCES (February 19-March 20): Looking for a fresh lease on life? Well, Pisces, whenever there's a planetary message emitting itself through your solar 4th house, we usually find a buildup of emotional residue (often a strange amalgam of childhood issues, triggered by small annoyances that take on exaggerated importance, linked to some much-needed action you're almost-but-not-quite ready to take) that begs for a little scrubbing-bubble action. And interestingly, the 4th house also links up with our domestic life, insofar as our private time home alone (and/or with our housemates) is often when we must contend with that which we avoided throughout the rest of our day out there in the world. Much can be made of this connection, not the least of which emphasizes the parallel in how we take care of ourselves in both literal and psychological contexts. That's why you mustn't underestimate the power of taking on some rejuvenating home improvement project, whether you rearrange the furniture or tend to your garden, clean out the crap from your kitchen cabinets or paint a room a dazzling new color. Browse a book on feng shui, and you just might discover your bed's facing the wrong way or your piles of unwanted crap are clogging up your money corner. (Of course, you don't need an ancient Chinese art or anyone else's expert opinion to find something that'll shift the energy at home.) Once you make some kind of a functional change in your living environment, don't be surprised if a corresponding shift in how you're handling your feelings—like, for instance, attaining a newfound clarity and/or finally becoming ready to take that much-needed action—follows right on its heels.