Venus-Mars Square: Passion or Pain in the Butt?


When Mars and Venus square off tomorrow (Tue May 23), what can we expect? Will sparks fly, or will our egos crunch against each other?

Mars and Venus are the yang and yin of the personal planets. They're a pair that complements each other perfectly, like cookies and milk… or two drastic different individuals speaking two completely different languages, with little room for understanding. Take your pick.

Mars is the get-up-and-go we each possess, propelling us to grab for what we want. Mars doesn't care what blocks its path to fulfillment—he goes for it anyway, and won't shy away from possible confrontation.

Venus, meanwhile, deploys the rules of attraction to draw objects of desire to her. Why fight, when you can just charm their pants off? Venus respects the sanctity of unions, and will do what she can to avoid conflict, in favor of compromise and collaboration.

With this week's square, these two essential behaviors come into conflict with each other. And interestingly, it's Venus, in bold-and-brassy Aries, who's got the fiercer temperament. Venus in Aries likes it hot, fast and impulsive, and is always on the prowl for something that'll heat her blood. If she finds it, she'll jump right in… but is likely to jump back out again just as quickly, once her interest wanes.

Mars in Cancer is more sensitive and soft, driven by his deep feelings rather than an offhand whim of stimulation. This Cancerian Mars moves by his moods, flowing in and out like the tide, testing the waters. His knack for caring and nurturing is profound… though he too might pull away at a moment's notice, to protect his delicate heart.

Under this effect of Venus squaring Mars, we may find ourselves caught in a cat-and-mouse game… a push-and-pull characterizing the ways we relate to one another. We may crave the directness of Venus in Aries, but find it difficult not to waver in our approach, due to Mars in Cancer. Within ourselves, we could sense a conflict between our desire for immediate action and the intuitive drive to follow our feelings… leaving us to weave in and out of our engagements, hot and cold, speedy then slow.

In our relationships, the square may play itself out with each individual in a specific planetary role—the wanton Venus-in-Aries lover searching for excitement, while the shy Mars-in-Cancer one's moody sensibilities dampen the sizzle. The Venusian would benefit from fostering a gentler, more patient attitude, while the Martian must simply burst through the shell to take the risk.

Is it you dying to make the first move, but leaving it up to the bashful party across from you who fears even looking into your eyes, straight on? This is perfect astrology for active seductions… especially by women who are tired of waiting for their sensitive men to take charge.

Despite its accompanying risk of inspiring disagreements, a square between Venus and Mars isn't all bad. Even if it causes a fight, we still have the fun of make-up sex. Sometimes, a little friction is a very good thing.