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Horoscopes | Week of November 21-27, 2005

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Have you ever heard the rumor that Aries folks aren't so good at follow-through… that they're superb at getting things going, but not as good at getting them done? Have you found this so-called 'rumor' to be a rather accurate account of your experience, or do you buck the trend and hold tight 'til the end? This week is an exercise in whether you can leave multiple opportunities open, so there are multiple possibilities for projects and processes and products you'll potentially be able to finish… when it's eventually the time to finish. That time is not now, however, and you can't be sure which options are the ones you're best suited to complete, or which interest you the most. Rather than striving to sift or shove through the multiplicity and, in your usual quick-as-a-bunny mode, decide what to trash and what to treasure, you'll be wisest to hold the several special selections simultaneously dangling. Is it possible that Aries often don't finish because you're too quick to rule things out, only to discover later than the sole commitment you rushed to make didn't prove to hold your attention?


TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Please get out of the house, Taurus… or off the couch, away from the chores, your nose out of the papers and your ass out into the world. How many times must I use this space to tell you about the magnificent wonders awaiting you at holiday parties, impromptu get-togethers, quilting bees, neighborhood beautification committee meetings, wacky cocktail lounges, bohemian coffeehouses, or right out on the damn street? A Jupiter-Uranus trine across the ultra-social 7th and 11th houses equals: The more out of your typical comfort-zone, same-spot-different-day milieu, the greater the chance to be more than you've already been, to meet more people from a broader cross-section spectrum, and to gain more from your interactions than merely passing the time. Saturn turning retrograde in your 4th, meanwhile, means a whole bunch more of the same (not 'reruns' as much as 'to-be-continueds') in your private emotional world. The healthiest combination of the two will bring both (1) a fresh breeze of other people's social energy into your stale air and (2) something else to do (something more fun!) besides reiterating tales from the crypt, starring the same old characters that loved you (and scarred you) from birth.


GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Don't distract yourself with whether somebody else is doing an adequate job as your friend, spouse, co-worker or peer. Perhaps you possess justifiable complaints, and perhaps you don't… but neither way should serve as the inspiration for where your efforts will be best spent this week. Who gives a damn? What matters most is your own insistence on continuing to finesse that one stubborn head-cold, that mess in your desk drawer, or your perpetually naughty puppy or kitty into submission to your most responsible management. There are still a couple tricks you haven't tried yet in your efforts to get that tenacious monkey off your back… and to emerge with improved confidence in your abilities to effectively and efficiently fulfill the requirements. No matter how frustrating, don't give up on the vision that you can achieve smoother sailing—even if you haven't a clue how to get there. Keep trying different stuff, but never lose sight of the goal. And remember, it's what you're doing that counts… with very little to do with anybody else. The emotional resolution you're looking for through hopes of 'working things out' with Mr. or Ms. Clueless can also be reached a different way—by being happy with, and proud of, yourself.


CANCER (June 21-July 22): Less about the nuts and bolts already. Aren't we having fun yet? Cancer, you should know better than to stress out about a perceived lack of progress, confusion as to which fork to follow, or any self-sabotaging fear that what you see now is all you're going to get. Tides come in, and tides go out, right? (And tides being pulled on by retrograde Mars and retrograde Mercury sort of just hang out somewhere in the middle.) But to allow all the uncertainty and apparent undoing and supposed unrequited desire (heh heh…) to spoil an otherwise lovely time, courtesy of Jupiter and Uranus skipping across the run-wild-and-be-free 5th/9th-house duo, is to wallow in a stagnant cesspool of That Which Cannot be Controlled. What is under your control is the delight you could take in making the most of every moment—in my book, that involves purposely saying what 'shouldn't' be said, using your outside voice inside, laughing more exaggeratedly at everything even slightly funny, and playing devil's advocate. Of course, these frisky encouragements could get you into little bits of trouble here and there, but nothing noteworthy past an instant. And since you're not likely to bring any practical or personal process to fruition within the next seven days, you might as well enjoy the time in other ways. Think of yourself as a loving rabble-rouser, with a hearty sense of playfulness and a devil-may-care attitude with what you remark aloud. For a short spell, at least, it won't hurt you or anyone else.


LEO (July 23-August 22): Do you know where you've been, what you've been up to and how you've been feeling over these past few months? It's review time, Leo, because the absolute worst thing you could do at this point in time is to forget what's gone down as of late—even if there are certain parts of it you'd prefer to forget. Sorry, charlie, Saturn's job as he moves through your sign is to teach you a lesson… and in order to learn, you must connect the dots and be prepared to present your findings, justify your progress or defend the terms of your thesis. Duh, that's why students take notes in class. So they remember what was said. So they can read back through the notes and reacquaint themselves with those silent a-has they uttered when they first 'got' what the teacher was intending. Saturn turns retrograde this week, Leo, which means he's heading back over the all the ground already traveled since mid-August. 'Where was I in mid-August?' you should now be asking yourself. 'What was I doing? What have I done since then? And have I learned anything?' Life right now—for all of us, but especially for you—is overwhelming inwardly-focused, so it doesn't matter if someone else is expecting you to perform your old tricks or sing the standing-room-only stand-bys. You need to be focused on your own internal struggles and strife, to make heads and tails of it in order to eventually work through it and emerge more outstanding than before. And you can't cram the night before the test either. Every day is the test.


VIRGO (August 23-September 22): I want to piggyback on last week's horoscope, since all the astro-action still revolves around your relation to relationships, Virgo. Jupiter and Uranus are in trine, conspiring to bust open your self-imposed limitations by revealing the voluptuous varieties of acceptable and less-acceptable-but-much-more-fun human behavior. These two planetary freedom-mongers disapprove of how you keep the people in your life in their respective places… saving the heartbreaking confessions for Mary, the rambunctious good times for Joe, the titillating gossip for Jennifer, and the heady political discourses for Morris. What's good for your growth is to stir the pot, to scramble the seating arrangements and eject everyone from their expected roles. Ask Mary for her opinions on the war, and get Morris drunk. Cry to Joe, and enroll Jennifer in a serious mutual self-improvement project. Treat everybody differently, and invite each to shine in ways you've never seen them before. Not only is it a show of good faith to your friends and partners that you think more of them than they feared, but it's a personal risk to color outside the lines of your relationships and behave more spontaneously.


LIBRA (September 23-October 22): Though, by definition, Librans are 'other-people people' and succeed quite well when partnered up in collaborative efforts, the planets have extra-special prizes (cars! appliances! cash!) for those of you willing to toil beyond your alliances and break free from the typical grind. See, Libra, you possess additional ideas and visions not yet included in the official team plan… and perhaps some of these would be better enacted on your own, during your 'off time' when you needn't secure anybody else's approval and can proceed however you see fit. Now don't go shattering the sanctity of your interpersonal commitments in order to pursue a more solitary venture— the worst threat of that comes from trying to conceal what else you're busy with. There's no shame in investing energy in more than one project at once, and no reason to lug around the burden of hiding the one hand's actions from the other. And you have plenty of inspiration to carry you through it all, too. Considering we've still got Mercury and Mars retrograde, I wouldn't necessarily rush out and buy up a bunch of supplies or definitively pledge your services in this new capacity. Just think about it: What else productive could you be doing with your time, for your own satisfaction… and your own profit?


SCORPIO (October 23-November 21): Your self-congratulatory challenge—and I think you should choose to accept it—is to behave as the true king or queen that you are… but without mistakenly acting like your power entitles you toreign over anything or anybody else. In other words, you are strongly encouraged to assume vast amounts of personal power… but not towards any certain object of desire, especially those which might require that you goad or finagle a person or situation to your preferred thinking. The minute your posturing involves comparing yourself to someone in a 'better' or 'worse' position, scheming to have things work in your favor or swallowing your own press and demanding diva treatment, then you're using your power instead of smoothly, gracefully and non-manipulatively enjoying it. If you feel obliged to declare your opinion, do so because you want to add to the public dialogue… not to force them to see it your way. If you are moved to read someone, do it to his or her face because you're lovingly offering a statement of healing truth… not just to vent aggression or talk shit. And if you really want something, simply make it known. Then, let it go and step away. You just might find this low-pressure, blatant-agenda-hanging-out, live-and-let-live approach to be far more effective than you'd ever imagined.


SAGITTARIUS (November 22-December 21): Whatever you've just figured out, Sagittarius, isn't as 'figured out' as you might figure. And what you think you believe doesn't match up quite so well with what you believed you thought. Retrograde Mercury is creeping back into your 12th house for a few weeks, taking away the sense you'd almost made clear… and replacing it with open-ended bewilderment. It'll make life easier if you just raise your hands to the sky and laugh, rather than pressing your temples and moaning in frustration. What, after all, are you going to do? Demand that decisions be made and commitments committed to when you aren't ready yet? Piffle. That's just your antsy ego talking, and the only words coming out are resting on false assumptions about what 'should' or 'must' happen on a certain timeline. As the astrologer, I'm the one who's privy to the timeline, and the only impending benchmark is the one where you finally let go of trying to control the circumstances of a particularly uncontrollable moment in time. That panicky sensation in your stomach and your arms is what The Unknown actually feels like, when you aren't covering over its nerve-inducing vibes with loud fast movements.


CAPRICORN (December 22-January 19): As your ruling planet Saturn stations retrograde in your 8th house, you're being pressed to discern the brutal reality of your true underlying emotions, not the ones you imagine you're 'supposed to' feel. Looking back over these past four months—this is your cue to pause and extensively consider your journey during this time—you will surely notice how Saturn's presence in your 8th has literally forced you to face some dark places inside your psyche. While many external situations have glided along, developed or stalled according to forces outside your immediate command, your insides have been actively chipping away at themselves, tired of playing dead and pretending everything's always 'just fine'. What a shock! You've got more going on in there besides mere stoic tolerance! Parts of you that use exclamation points shamelessly! Passions literally fighting to be heard and seen! Fury that wants its due voice, too! Emotional ambitions, as real and vital as the earthly ones you're more accustomed to pursuing! Take the week to review the exclamatory self-discoveries you've unearthed since July… because you're not done with 'em yet. Now, over the next few months, you've got to share what you're learning about what you most deeply crave with those in your life—first and foremost, any intimate romantic partners—and conquer the 'what-if-they-find-out?' fears that torture your soul into stoicism. What must you share, to achieve your own highest well-being? That's what you need to be thinking about.


AQUARIUS (January 20-February 18): From where you are, Aquarius, it's wisest to keep one eye peeled ahead and the other aimed back at the past. Ahead are tremendously fortuitous possibilities for expanding what you do professionally to a far vaster place, with many more responsibilities (which you've earned) and many more people watching (which you've craved)… and a radical departure from your previous material status. Will you suddenly start earning a whole bunch more? Will you switch from salaried to freelance contract? Will you sacrifice the safe paycheck for the more rewarding but financially riskier leap-off-the-cliff? Nurture your favorite dream with the best intentions, and give Jupiter and Uranus through Sep 06 to make something happen. Meanwhile, back in the past, relationship issues continue to trip you up… and you won't be able to move forward until you truly and completely revisit what's already transpired. Honestly, being alone is the easiest answer—a little lonely, sure, but you get to maintain complete control over your own every move. However, insisting that you get better at interpersonal compromise is where Saturn's laying the law. What you gain is a type of love that isn't based on intellectual idealism or ideology, but on genuine acceptance of human variety. (It's called 'walking your talk'.) What you must give up, though, is the fantasy that you know better. All in all, with one eye looking one way and the other looking another, it's also probably wisest not to stray too far from where you are since it'll be impossible to fully watch where you're going.


PISCES (February 19-March 20): Okay, so last I left you, Pisces, I'd commissioned you to provide feedback on which element of the current Pisces experience I'm missing in my horoscope. (Thanks to those of you who responded for your generous commentary on the matter… especially those who were surprised to hear I sometimes struggle at horoscope-writing, and praised me for being 'right on'!) No surprise here, but there wasn't exactly a consensus among the responses… and what could I have expected from a group of Pisceans, otherwise referred to as the 'none of the above' category (with only fondness, of course). If I had to pick one most commonly mentioned item among the replies, however, it would be anger—anger withheld, anger unleashed, dull persistent anger disguised as something less menacing. But I don't expect this 'anger' thing to apply to all of you, varied bunch that you are. The real point of the exercise was to get you thinking in wide generalizing strokes, to determine for yourself what single overarching theme or emotion best characterizes your recent weeks and months. The act of having to summarize and communicate your findings, as in an email to me, forces you to search for clarity… and that's just what you're needing to do, especially with your 9th house lit up by Jupiter and Mercury's lapsing back there in retrograde slippage. What does it all mean? What am I missing… or, more importantly, what are you missing? It's not too late to put form to these otherwise-elusive strains of significance. If you're not going to email me, then type yourself an email. Print it out and tack it up. But, as last week, there's no need to risk repercussions by disclosing your higher meanings to those with power over you. It's you who needs to understand.